Lily and Nina have been out all nigh on E and are now recovering in their favourite all night cake shop run by Amir also the local drug dealer. The previous owner Bobby is back from her majesty's pleasure and wants his cake shop back.
When VARADIN, the Bulgarian ambassador, arrives at his new posting in London, a few days earlier than expected, he finds the embassy in disarray and no preparations in place to celebrate Bulgaria's accession into the EU. Under pressure from Madame SELIANOVA, the President's wife, a patron of the event, Varadin's political standing rests on him ensuring the Queen attends the concert.
With the event fast approaching, Varadin, desperate to secure the Queen, seeks help from PR firm 'Famous Connections', unaware that they provide celebrity look-alikes for the fulfilment of their clients' sexual fantasies. He discovers the truth only a day before the concert and Madame Selianova is already on her way to London.
Unknown to Varadin, the embassy cook, BANICHAROV is helping an ex-Soviet criminal and unsuccessful Bulgarian actor store a dozen stolen ducks in the embassy freezers, but unknowing to them the ducks are GPS chipped and Scotland Yard are hot on their tracks.
To complicate matters, Varadin fancies the gorgeous KATIA - the embassy cleaner by day and stripper by night, and she’s been offered a job at 'Famous Connections' as a Princess of Wales look-alike; Varadin has no clue as to Katya's work beyond the embassy walls.
When a henpecked husband gets invited to a stag weekend away to Amsterdam with the lads, how does he get to go, living with mrs impossible, it’s a nightmare.
A humorous urban romantic drama, which centres on Twenty-Five year old Kizzy - recently recovered from breast cancer.
Post Mastectomy and with an understandably low self-image, especially given her tender years, we follow her as she goes out on a date with her old school flame, Eli.
Two inept criminals: Liam is youthfully eager. Graham is older, not wiser. They locked themselves in the bank vault six hours ago. Liam realises that Graham's best idea, isn't. The oxygen's running low, the bank staff are running late and Graham has 'the runs'. Can they pull together in time?
Damian and Mark, two bored 16-year-olds, long to escape their tiny forgotten village high on the Northern moors of England. They spend their time idly taking pot-shots at sheep and passing cars with Damian's air rifle. But everything changes when they covertly witness a large thug and a businessman meeting in a deserted lay-by to exchange drugs and money. The boys unwittingly cause the drug deal to go horribly wrong, and the thug kills his cocaine-dealing 'business associate'. When the thug flees the scene, Damian and Mark seize the opportunity to steal the drug dealer's classic American Cadillac, together with his gun, a sackful of cash and a kilo of cocaine.
Now all they have to do is buy a spade to bury the drug dealer's body (stashed in the trunk), appease Damian's mouthy girlfriend, lose their virginity, get off the moors, and head South to Spain. Easier said than done when the killer's in pursuit and you're - Rebels Without a Clue.
Robinson in Ruins is an account of a journey by a wandering, erratic scholar, through landscapes in the south of England. Its fictional narration begins: 'When a man called Robinson was released from Edgcott open prison, he made his way to the nearest city, and looked for somewhere to haunt'.
Robinson ‘believed he could communicate with a network of non-human intelligences determined to preserve the possibility of life’s survival on the planet’ and ‘was equipped with an ancient ciné camera, with which he made images of his everyday surroundings’. He surveyed the centre of the island on which he was shipwrecked: 'The location,' he wrote, 'of a Great Malady, that I shall dispel, in the manner of Turner, by making picturesque views, on journeys to sites of scientific and historic interest.'
The film consists of these views. The cinematography began in January 2008 and continued until November, just after the peak of that year’s global banking crisis. The film’s unplanned journey ‘rediscovers’ several locations associated with capitalism’s development since the 16th century and resistance to it. Vanessa Redgrave’s narration includes references to the deepening economic crisis, climate change and mass-extinction, but manages to reach an optimistic conclusion.
The Rule Of Thumb is the story of a Mother and Sons unhealthy and clinging relationship. Neil Barrow a forty something Mummy's boy attempts to make his Mum proud leading to a disastrous stand off at the local school.
Alex, a young and unemployed actor, is chosen by a film-maker to make a documentary. The film-maker records Alex’s daily life.
Alex is initially excited, thinking perhaps it will lead to stardom. When Alex lands a part in a stage play about a film-maker turned serial-killer Alex’s life takes an unexpected turn. A strange figure follows him, young girls circle him, he is attacked for no apparent reason but the ‘documentary’ is starting to look better.
Alex realises that this is all too much to be random. He suspects the cast from the play, then his new ‘girlfriend’, then anyone else who happens to cross his mind.
At the dress rehearsal of the play, it becomes clear to Alex that the film-maker is behind the unexpected events but it is too late for Alex to escape his close-up - roll camera!
